150 Steps...In the Present Moment

OK, now it's getting serious. We sent our application to the placement agency today.

When I started this blog, it was inspired by a conversation that I had with a neighbor early this summer, in which I remarked that "if the adoption process has 150 steps, we're on step 6." We just completed step 75. We're halfway there, if the completion of the home study can be considered the midway mark. We turned over the completed binder of paperwork and then plunged into a discussion about next steps with the placement agency as well as how they will coordinate with M, our adoption counselor. Toward the end as we began to wrap things up, I asked M if she saw any reasons to think that she might not recommend us. "I never would have let us go this far if I had any concerns. We would have known by the second meeting," she said. And so we reach the 75th step. There's a nice, comfy landing here where we can catch our breath. Step 1 seems so far away now, coming just days after my grandmother died as Jenn and I began to discuss in all serious...

Chris sits swearing at his computer last evening...or rather swearing at the  login  section of the e-Trade website. His  username  and password aren't working. "This IS my password," I can hear him muttering furiously as he tries yet again to  login , "AND this IS my  username . Why isn't this working???" More furious muttering and tapping at the keyboard. Meanwhile at my desk I am transferring the originals of various documents and letters from our   homestudy  binder into the binder that we are preparing to give social worker M. A few more expletives and a phone call to e-Trade later and Chris is logged in to retrieve the financial information that we must include in our  homestudy  paperwork. He completes the financial form shortly after that without any further ado. The binder is completed just a few minutes shy of midnight. The hand-off to social worker M is this evening. We're in the homestretch of this part o...

Old fear: Being isolated with a small child and slipping into post-adoption depression. Other women I know have mentioned feeling very isolated being at home with an infant or a toddler. My own mom shared with me tales of her struggles with feeling lonely and isolated when my sister and I were small. I think she worries about that for me. This is something about which I worry a bit (and used to worry about A LOT), but thankfully am no longer letting stand in the way of becoming a parent. For one thing, I finally realized that there are SO many more resources for parents today than there when my mom was taking care of me as a small child. There are more resources than there were even five or ten years ago. There are play groups and online support groups. My gym even has a lovely little sweetly  decorated  day care for infants and toddlers so that I can exercise without having to worry about getting a babysitter. One of the things that I am starting to do for myself and ...

Chris and I have now taken 4 parenting classes with 2 left to complete the required series. For the most part they are all interesting and informative, although the "Creating Your Profile" course did provoke some yawns. Why? Well, the course is geared to people who don't really write much or who are not confident in their writing skills. Being that Chris and I are both writers I can't say that we found the course as useful as someone would who doesn't write or feels very nervous about putting together a profile. I imagine that this course is a very helpful tool in the adoption process for non-writers. The course that makes us break out into laughter from time to time is " Conspicuous  Families: Race, Culture, and Adoption." Please don't get me wrong -  transracial  adoption is no laughing matter. However, part of the course involves providing strategies for parents of multicultural families to deal with intrusive comments and questions. One...

We've completed four hours of our online classes for prospective adoptive parents. Interesting stuff so far though I feel like I didn't actually see the sun on this lovely Saturday. Only six more hours to go and we'll be pros at this!

We have to go to school to learn to be parents. Really. It's true. Well, we actually just have to sit in our own home office to participate in online parenting classes. This weekend we'll be engaging in a marathon of educational activity...10 hours of parenting classes as one of the final steps in our home study process. So here's what we'll be taking... Ain't  Misbehavin ': Discipline and the Adoptive Child Creating an Adoption Profile that Works Conspicuous Families: Race, Culture and Adoption Let's Talk Adoption: A Lifetime of Family Conversations The Journey of Attachment Finding the Missing Pieces: Helping Adopted Children Cope with Loss and Grief I have the feeling that our brains are going to be VERY full by the end of this weekend. And that these classes will inspire quite a few future blog posts. Perhaps on my way home from work I'll stop at Staples to  purchase  Chris and I some new school supplies...and then on to the gr...